Tomorrow (27/7/2011) will be six months since Steve died.
Since releasing the book I haven’t done much on the poetry front but I didn’t want to let the day pass without composing a poem for Steve…
Been six long months since you went away,
And I think about you as I go through my day,
It feels like I’ve sobbed a million tears,
And that we were robbed of a lot of good years.
But in all honesty any years going by,
Would have made you more weaker, and still you would die,
And the future look bleaker and still I would cry,
And I mustn’t begrudge you your peace…
I remember you wanted release…
So I have to remember, though it don’t seem right,
You were tired of this world; you were tired of the fight.
Played our CD each day, with the snaps of us two,
And the smiles on our faces hide bitterness too,
So I mustn’t begrudge you your peace…
Must remember you needed release…
Got my list of the things that I wanted to do,
Wrote the book, planted tree, at last things I’ve seen through,
But they don’t mean a thing without you here to see,
They have been done for you and not only for me,
See I haven’t forgotten bout you…
Was the very least that I could do…
Yeah I get through each day now as best as I’m able,
I talk to your casket that sits on your table,
I know that I look now as if I’m unstable,
Who cares if unstable is true,
It’s the way that I cope without you…
And I gave up the booze and the other stuff too,
That I once used for comfort, to help me get through,
And the ironic part is that now I am free,
All those things that I craved are no longer for me,
I won’t know if they hadn’t been there,
Would I given you much better care?
So life carries on and there’s good times and bad,
As the wound of grief heals it gets less and less sad,
And the ghost of your illness walks further away,
But I call to the ghost and I beg it to stay,
Coz the last thing I ever could do,
Is forget about how it took you.
And the last thing I ever will do,
Is forget what HD did to you!